“She has dementia, she doesn’t remember, she doesn’t understand, it’s just another day for her. She doesn’t even know what day it is and won’t remember a thing after we’re gone. It’s not going to make any difference to her.”
The excuses go on and on, don’t they?
Just this once, think about the woman who is your mother instead of making it all about you.
Think of what you can do for her. Think about creating special moments just for her and live them with her.
Love her, care for her, respect her.
Create precious moments of happiness for her.
Give her your time and your love. That is the best gift for any mother. You can’t buy gifts like this anywhere. They are made and created from one human being to another.
In spite of Alzheimer’s, your mum can still see, hear, think her own thoughts, and most of all, she can FEEL.
Her emotions are as real as they always were.
She can smile and she can cry and she can feel every emotion in-between.
She is still ALIVE.
She did not seek or want this cruel disease. Nor does she deserve to have her life taken away from her piece by piece by this incurable disease. She wanted to live her life and grow old as a mother, grandmother, wife, sister, aunt, and friend.
Don’t deny your mother the gift of you.
She still needs her family and friends, as well as love, support and companionship. Help her live with the disease on her terms. Give her meaningful moments and live with her in those moments, however brief those moments may be.
Don’t abandon her. Leaving her alone to cope with dementia is cruel, it is selfish, and it is a betrayal of love.
She may not be the mother you once knew, but the essence of who she really is still lies within. It’s up to you to find it.
Don’t allow this insidious disease to dictate your relationship with your mother.
Don’t allow this insidious disease to deny wonderfully unique memories to the both of you.
No matter what stage of the disease your mum is in, it’s sad and heartbreaking to deal with. It’s a very difficult time. All the more reason to give her your time and your love on this day and always.
Happy Mother’s Day to all Mums.